Searching for a Trip Down Memory Lane...

One might think I've been in mourning since MJ passed away 2-1/2 weeks ago because I haven't blogged since. Rest assured, I was not that rabid of a fan. Okay, maybe a little, but certainly not enough to overshadow my entire life. We've just been busy. There are many things I could have blogged about, but nobody wants to read about how we got drunk on Fourth of July due to one to many "Wayners." I'm a little more random here than that.

So today, who the hell knows WHY, I was thinking about McDonalds. Not today's McDonald's, but old school Mickey D's. I don't know why, it was just one of those freak things that worms it's way into my head. Maybe it's because we eat there entirely too often. It's not even a treat anymore for Braeden, who asked to go to Subway instead the other day. Don't get me wrong, my child is not fed a diet of chicken mcnuggets and french fries on a daily basis. Look at the kid, he's a twig. But life is busy and sometimes on the run, I have no qualms about stopping. He eats apples there too, but not in place of his beloved french fries. He's not a freak. But when I was a kid, going to McDonalds was a special occasion.

Anyhoo, I plopped my lazy ass in front of the computer and Googled vintage/old school McDonalds (cue banner ad on right). What I was really looking for was old packaging. I know, you're thinking WHY? Again, I don't know. But you know how sometimes when you see something as simple as an old advertisement or tv show or something it takes you back and you get that warm and fuzzy feeling all over? I wanted my fuzzies to come from that old brown chicken mcnugget packaging. Me=Dork.

That's what I was looking for. Instead, what I found was a slew of old McDonalds commercials. Have you seen the really old ones? I never have. I didn't realize that Ronald McDonald started out as a creepy clown (well, I guess some things never change) who wore food on his head and a cup on his nose. You didn't either. Don't pretend you did.

THIS..


STARTED AS THIS:


Fascinated by the pictures, I then watched some old ads on You Tube. I'm telling you right now, if you're looking for a good time, not much can beat old television commercials. But this takes the cake:

Watch the Video From Hell Here

No really, you need to watch the video...

Four thoughts come to mind when watching this train wreck...

1. Mom says not to talk to strangers but apparently she forgot to mention not eating food that falls from the sky or comes from the general crotch area of a creepy clown. "I'm not a stranger, I'm Ronald McDonald!" Uh-oh, this can't end well.

2. Why is the kid trying so hard to grab Ronnie's ass at the end of the advert?

3. Why on EARTH did someone think that the food Ronald has on his magic tray would appeal to ANYONE? Look at those "french fries"! Seriously, WTF are those???

4. And finally...Ronald looks like a goddamn pervert! And the kid walks away with him in the end! Who thought that this would make a good face for McDonalds? No Mother I know would be okay with their children being within 10 feet of this lunatic. Except, I suppose, the ones that sent their children to Neverland Ranch. (Ooops, it's not nice to speak ill of the dead...but really...).

When reading some comments posted after the ad, it seems I am not alone in my own subliminal world....

I'm supremely creeped out. And think, all I wanted was warm fuzzies. Instead, I won't sleep tonight...